Give 'Em Hell, Kid

Hey everyone, I wanted to leave a post here that everyone could reference if they wanted.

First off, we haven't trashed our blogs. We just archived them. After reading what happened with someone else's blog comments, we decided that discretion was the better part of valor.

Second, thank you to those of you who've been so kind to us. You know who you are, and so do we. And we appreciate you all.

Third, a brief explanation of the ravages of high blood sugar, for those of you who aren't familiar with diabetes. Imagine, if you will, having the worst day of PMS you've ever had. F9r the guys, sorry, I don't have an equivalent comparison, just imagine you've got the worst hangover of your life. Your nerves are frazzled, you have the shortest temper known to Man, and to top it off, everything that happens around you gets to you, including what you're doing yourself. Now...multiply how you feel...by about 50. That's what going through what I call "blood sugar ricochet" feels like. Up, then down, then up again. You feel like you're in a fucking pinball machine.

Sometimes it actually makes me hurt. I can't explain that very well, just accept that it takes a heavy toll on your body, your mind, your emotions. Insulin's a hormone, so when those levels fluctuate, so do your moods. And some people wonder why I don't have kids. Could you imagine pregnant me with bad blood sugars? Mother, please.

And stress plays a big part in my blood sugar levels, which is something new to me as I've hit my 40s. It didn't really bother me when I was younger. Now, though, it comes at me with both barrels, and I invariably lose.

I personally feel that that isn't a good "excuse" for my behaviour. I'm usually quite adept at keeping my anger locked up and venting in more appropriate ways. Unfortunately, I sometimes give in to the urge to lash out at someone who pushes my buttons. Last night, I let someone push those buttons, and I wish I had walked away. Not because I want to take back what I said, but because I don't approve of the way I handled it.

I've made a promise to myself and my friends. I fully intend to stay the fuck out of any more drama, confrontations, questionable discussions, whatever. I will, however, defend my friends and myself at any cost. Please keep that in mind, because dammit, I am a motherfucking Punk. I say what I mean, and I mean what I say. My convictions are how I live, not just what I preach.

But you know what?

Its still all about the love. Sometimes it just has to be tough.

J